Secret Diary of a Trampolinist aged (43 ¾)

Part 5 - The adventure continues..

07 Feb 2004 - Hello again. So where was Oct to Dec 2003? There wasn't one.

It's catch up time as some of you, well at least one of you are wondering what's going on. Pleased to say I'm still bouncing but there's been a few changes in t' club. Do you like that bit of northern inflection. I've been watching the Peter Kay DVD (at the Bolton Albert Hall) and it's rubbed off. Funniest thing since my first front drop; laughed so much I had to go and brew up to prevent further injury to my chuckle muscle. If you haven't seen it then buy it right now. (Peter, if you're reading this we could do wi a few bob to keep site on t' internet).

I digress. The leg is better. I would like to thank the well wishers but there were none. I was resting for 10 weeks as a result of the injury and naturally there was no trampolining progress. Sadly the two hour session on Tuesday has moved to a one hour session on Saturday. There could be no worse time to hold an adult's session as most people, like myself, will have no doubt consumed a pizza and a couple of glasses of cabernet the night before. As if the resting, halving of the session time and early saturdays were not enough to contend with I also had my first trampoline accident.

A lack of concentration (co-ordination, fitness and skill also) caused me to back flip from a seat drop. I had just enough momentum to rotate through 180 and land on my head. Everything below (or in this case above) mid chest tried to fold into the other half of my body resulting in a good winding and a pain around the sternum. Apart from now being 50cm shorter there were no lasting problems.

Then along came Christmas and by virtue of inactivity and good eating I gained about 3Kg. So here we are, a fat midget with a funny accent.

Nevertheless, myself and another brave adult called 'She' have entered the Salford tariff competition on 21 February. She's great but I can't through my routine. Still, I have another hour to practice before the big day so all is not lost!

Depending on the degree of humiliation I will report back on how it went.

14 Feb 2004 - Valentines day but fortunately no massacre.

Almost missed training because the Postie was late. Waited just in case but as with the previous 44 years there were no cards. However, things began to look up as I successfully completed my routine. Now all I need to do is to complete it all at once instead of in two halves! I know there is no more training before the event on Saturday but I'm optimistic it will come together during the warm up.

There are a lot of first time competitors from West View at this event and on Saturday the new ones were being "buddied" by the more experienced members. I was introduced to the group whose age ranged from 8 to 15 years old as a kind of example to them. I think it was along the lines of "If he can do it.." You get the picture. I can only assume the uncontrollable fits of laughter from the less mature members of the group was a manifestation of their nervousness.

Almost had another accident this week as during mid bounce I remembered a joke. "How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler!". Sorry, I won't make a habit of it.

21 Feb 2004 - Big day in little Eccles..

An exciting week as we learn the venue for the big comp has changed. Everyone must be contacted and informed, maps prepared, lifts arranged all of which was a good distraction as I was beginning to feel nervous.

I was worried I would not remember the routine and so I took to practicing it at home without the trampoline. My wife, who has so far resited all attempts to get her to bounce, found this so funny I had to eject her from the room out of concern for the lounge suite.

As the big day approached I kept adjusting my ambitions. At first I wanted to win, then it was top half, then 10 bounces without wiping out and finally just having the courage to go through with it. It should be a reminder for all adults that competitions are not trivial and can be a cause for anxiety, particularly when you don't look good in shorts!

Many times I have told my children to just get on with it, do their best, don't worry, just have fun! Ha, when you're so nervous you might just be sick it's hard to see where the fun is. But the good news is that my fellow bouncers supported me and got me through it.

It was a tough field. Some of those youngsters were really up for it but I still managed to get a 4th place. The trophy is great, see below, but the best thing of all is that I did it and survived. I may not make the olympics this time round but success is relative and the world champion could not feel a greater sense of achievement. Award 8 here I come!

My Trophy

28 Feb 2004 - Happy Birthday to Me!!

Birthday yesterday, celebrated being 45 last night so no bouncing for me today. For those of you who cannot comprehend 45 years age, well I'm too young for national service but just old enough to remember England winning the world cup, the Beatles, Niel Armstrong taking one small step for man, Woodstock, the Isle of Wight Festival, Raleigh Choppers, the Stylophone, Woodentops, the first color tv, George Best (when he was playing!), good morning Tokyo (Olympics), Rowen and Martins Laugh In, Jubliees (triangular ice pop things), Aztec bars, Spangles etc., etc. Funny though, I still find it hard to remember a routine from one week to the next.

When I'm old enough, I'm going to take up golf.